Fri, Feb. 20th, 2015

still_intrepid: (avalanche)
That's what it kind of feels like sometimes?  Like, plonk, here is some GLOOM on you for no especial reason.

Meh.  What would really really help is to feel like I'm making progress on this piece I'm trying to write -- the last couple days I have tried in a more focussed way but I still have really no idea of the shape of the finished thing so it's hard.  

Work was super-busy (and so I was really annoyed and everyone and everything for a bit there but honestly I don't really feel that anymore, so that's fine), choir yesterday was sort of mixed, I'm still staying up way late and sleeping in and I've got many emails and adminny things still to attend to -- well all that doesn't really amount to much, does it?  

Presentation - which ended up being super duper short - on Tuesday went fine in the event, did I say?  And I got two absolutely lovely reviews on a fic so that's good.  I'm violinning a bit more again, should keep that up.  And listening to new music, which, again, should/could spend many more hours on where does the time actually in fact go?  

Also listening to videos of blackbirds singing!  For composing reasons, but actually tis really calming.....  here!

Ugh, I dunno.  Again.  All I need to do is get out of this rut for a few days and get some work in and I'll feel much better, but the thing is I'm always saying this and doing this.  And it's not crunch time yet but I do need to get a move on deadline-wise at some point, and I think, Well surely you wouldn't let all this time slip by without getting stuff done, and yet.   I am tremendously good at self-sabotage, guh.  (It's a cycle, yeah, like I feel kind of lonely but I also feel too stressed to see people!)

December 2015

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